


Together

by shinysylver



Series: Settled [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Carol and Daryl are also BFF, Carol likes Ezekiel, Coming Out, Conversations, Developing Relationship, Getting Together, Holding Hands, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 11:45:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10898694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinysylver/pseuds/shinysylver
Summary: Daryl couldn't stay in this inbetween place where he did shit like hold Paul's hand, but didn't let himself acknowledge what it meant. At this point he was avoiding the issue mostly because it scared him and not because he didn't know what he wanted.





	Together

**Author's Note:**

> There was such a great response to my first Daryl/Jesus fic that I decided to try my hand at a sequel. :D

The Kingdom cafeteria gave Daryl flashbacks to his school years. Most of the time he never even thought about that part of his life, but sitting in the crowded cafeteria eating food off those damn plastic trays brought up some truly unpleasant memories.

At least this time he actually had a friend to sit with and none of the curious stares were hostile or fearful. Back then he'd never been sure which was worse--that people hated him or that they were scared of him.

It was one of a million reasons that Daryl hadn't spent much time in school. He'd skipped more than he'd attended and it wasn't like the teachers had cared. After Merle, no one had had any expectations that a Dixon would graduate and so it hadn't been a surprise when he'd dropped out at sixteen.

"How's Jesus?" Carol asked in her sweet, pleasant voice. He never trusted that voice because it was fake as hell.

"Grumpy," Daryl answered before he shoved a heaping spoonful of beans into his mouth. Daryl didn't blame Paul for his bad mood. He hated feeling trapped too. Hell, he was feeling claustrophobic and he was able to walk out of the Kingdom anytime he wanted to.

"And how are you?" Carol asked, her voice still annoyingly fake. It wasn't that he didn't think she cared, but there was obviously something else going on under the surface.

"Drop the act," Daryl said. "What do you really want to know?"

Carol narrowed her eyes at him, but he was relieved to see the vacant smile fade into the fierce expression he was used to. "We haven't talked much since the last time you were in the Kingdom. When you lied to me."

"You didn't want to know the truth," Daryl pointed out. "Said that our life was destroying you."

Carol shook her head. "We don't lie to each other, Daryl. You and me, _we don't lie._ "

Daryl dropped his eyes to his plate. He'd hated lying to her, but she'd put him in an impossible situation and his concern for her had led to the lie. He couldn't regret trying to protect her.

"This isn't just about Glenn and Abraham," Carol continued with just the slightest waver on their names that only someone who knew her well would notice. "Jesus was feeling talkative after his pain pills last night and he told me what Negan did to you. Why didn't you tell me? I didn't even know you'd been taken!"

Daryl silently cursed himself for leaving Carol to watch over Paul while he'd taken a turn at the gate. "Wasn't anything to tell."

Carol gave him a long disbelieving stare. "Daryl--"

He shook his head sharply to stop her before she could press him. The less he thought about his time at Sanctuary the better.  "It's over. I'm alive. Besides, we had more important things to worry about."

There was always something more important to worry about. They never got a damn break.

She sighed. "I suppose I should just be grateful Jesus was there so _someone_ knows to look after you."

Daryl was pretty sure that he was the one looking after Paul these days, but he wasn't going to point that out. Besides, part of him was glad that Paul had been there too. Paul had seen him as near to broken as he'd ever been and he'd never once looked at Daryl with pity or judgment. He'd just gotten Daryl clean clothes and helped him bandage his injuries.

"Look, we all keep things to ourselves," Carol said. "But, the big things? Don't hide those. Even if I'm dumb enough to think you should."

Daryl absently pushed a spear of broccoli around on his plate. It was stupid, but all the talk of lying and hiding things made him feel guilty for not telling Carol that he was gay. He'd always been able to talk to her easier than anyone and it felt wrong to tell Rick and not her.

"I'm gay," Daryl blurted out before he could think about it for too long. At least it was easier to say this time.

Carol smiled at him, a genuinely kind smile unlike her fake one from earlier. "I know, but I'm glad you told me."

His head jerked up in surprise. "You know?"

"Daryl, the way you look at Jesus doesn't leave much doubt." Carol's smile turned mischievous. "Besides Pookie, I practically threw myself at you and _nothing_." 

Daryl felt his cheeks burning. This was why he didn't like talking about this shit. It was embarrassing as hell. "Stop."

Carol shook her head and laughed. It was so nice to hear her laugh again that Daryl couldn't even complain that it was at him. "Don't worry, it's ancient history. At the time I was just looking for someone to protect me. Then I learned how to protect myself. I don't need a man for that."

She glanced to the right, her smile softening. Daryl followed her gaze and saw Ezekiel sitting at a table full of kids.

"What do you need a man for?"

He'd asked himself a variation of that question every night as he watched Paul sleep. He was genuinely curious what her answer would be.

"Need?" Carol repeated thoughtfully, her eyes still on Ezekiel. "I think I might need a man that can remind me what it means to be human."

When he thought about it, Carol's answer wasn't all that different from Rick saying that Michonne helped keep him settled. They were both looking for a kind of peace and he couldn't help wondering if Paul could give him that too.

Carol turned her attention back to him. "Are you going to talk to him before we leave?"

Daryl shoved the broccoli in his mouth. "'Bout what?"

Carol rolled her eyes. "You know what."

"Are you and Rick in cahoots?" Daryl asked. "And no, I don't see the point. I might not make it back at all."

The alliance had planned a strike against one of the larger Savior outposts. Taking it out would severely hinder Negan's ability to interrupt the supply lines going between the three communities and would be a chance for them to get more ammunition. The ammo they'd taken from Oceanside was almost gone and they wouldn't be able to win the war with spears and arrows. 

Carol frowned at him. "Don't talk like that."

Daryl shrugged. "It's the truth."

"It's not like you," Carol said. She gave him a long look. "We aren't ashes, Daryl. That's what you told me and you were right. You have to live now while you can. Trust me, hiding from life doesn't work."

He knew Carol was right. He couldn't stay in this inbetween place where he did shit like hold Paul's hand, but didn't let himself acknowledge what it meant. At this point he was avoiding the issue mostly because it scared him and not because he didn't know what he wanted.

"I'll talk to him when we get back."

Just the idea of it was terrifying, but Daryl had been facing terrifying things for his entire life--even long before the dead had started walking. At least talking to Paul had the potential to make him happy and happy was such a rare thing in his life that it was worth an awkward conversation.

If he survived.

**

Daryl looked away as the woman--he thought her name was Susan--collapsed in tears as Rick broke the bad news to her. Her son hadn't survived the raid.

Susan and her son had been at Alexandria for a while now, but he didn't really know them. They'd just been two of the faces in the background and he felt like shit because a part of him was _grateful_ that it was her son that died and not his family.

Seeing other people grieve made him even more determined to get back to the Kingdom and Paul that night instead of staying behind in Alexandria. He needed to see with his own two eyes that Paul was alive and well. It was almost scary how much he missed Paul, but they had been together so much for the past couple of weeks that just a few days apart felt like too long--especially since he'd left things unsettled between them.

"We should go," Daryl told Carol.

Neither of them were much for goodbyes, so they quietly packed their gear into the old Ford Taurus they were using and slipped out while everyone's attention was on the injured and grieving. Rick and the others knew they were planning to go back to the Kingdom tonight and that was good enough.

They rode in a comfortable silence for a long time because, unlike Rick, Carol didn't feel the need to annoy him with awful music. He appreciated that.

Eventually, though, Carol took her eyes off of the road for long enough to give him a thoughtful look. "You're finally ready aren't you?"

He nodded. "No point waitin'. Nothin's gonna change how I feel."

Admitting that out loud was hard, but finally making a decision was a relief. He'd never been one to hesitate, preferring action over too much self reflection. It was one of the biggest differences between him and Carol or Rick.

"This is a good thing," Carol told him. "You deserve this."

Daryl wasn't sure about that. He couldn't help thinking that Paul was getting the raw end of the deal--assuming he returned Daryl's interest at all. "Ain't never done this."

"I'm the last person to give relationship advice. My choices were… bad. But Daryl, the two of you are both good people. Don't make it more difficult than it needs to be," Carol said quietly as she steered the car carefully past a wreck that they'd never bothered to clear.

"You ain't that person anymore," Daryl insisted. Carol had come so far since he'd met her and hated to think she was still judging herself by the relationships she'd had before. "Ezekiel is weird as fuck, but he's good. Good for you too. Makes you smile."

"You think?" Carol asked as the guards opened the gate to let them into the Kingdom.

"Yeah. I do."

Carol smiled at him as they exited the car. It was good that she was still able to smile, even after the fighting they'd done at the outpost. Daryl had been worried that killing the Saviors would send her back into the self doubt and depression that had driven her away from the group.

She came around and pulled him down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Good luck."

Daryl nodded, not trusting himself to speak. He was just so damn happy to have her back. He watched her walk away in the direction of Ezekiel's garden, before turning and heading to Paul's room.

"You're back!" Paul exclaimed as soon as Daryl entered the room that they'd been sharing. He looked Daryl up and down. "You okay?" 

"Fine," Daryl said. He rubbed at his jaw where one of the Saviors had gotten a punch in. It was tender, but all things considered not bad. "Just a few bruises."

"Good."

"How're you?"

Paul made a face. "Going stir crazy and my leg hurts." 

"You been takin' your meds?"  

"Just aspirin," Paul answered. "Without you or Carol around I wasn't about to take the good stuff." He hesitated. "Besides, I've had enough. I can manage the pain without them now." 

That wasn't the first time Paul had been cagey about the pain pills, but Daryl decided not to press him on it. That shit was addictive as hell so it was good to play it cautious.  

Besides they had more important things to talk about.

"Can't do much about the leg, but how about a walk?" Daryl suggested, hoping to buy himself some time to figure out how to talk to Paul.

Paul's face lit up. "Get me out of here. _Please._ "

Daryl glanced out the window. It was almost dark and had been raining off and on all day--not exactly the best conditions for a man in a wheelchair.

"Can't go outside," Daryl said. He wasn't going to budge on that no matter how disappointed Paul looked, but he could at least get him out of the room. "But I know a place."

He helped Paul into the wheelchair--resolutely ignoring the way being close to Paul made his stomach churn--and wheeled him carefully out of the room so that his leg wouldn't bump into the door frame.

Paul's stared longingly out the front door as they passed. "Where are you taking me?"

"The zoo," Daryl said with a smirk. Paul's room was on the first floor of the main building, which also housed the old loading dock where Shiva's cage was kept.

Shiva stood up when they entered the room and Daryl left Paul's chair well outside the range of curious paws while he approached the cage.

"Hey girl," Daryl murmured as he reached his hand out for her to sniff. Just like before she rubbed her head gently against him.

"Of course the tiger likes you," Paul said, bemused. "It's like you're a Disney princess."

"What?!" Daryl spun to face Paul who immediately burst into laughter. Daryl was starting to think his entire purpose in life was making the people he cared about laugh. At him.

"You know… like Cinderella with the birds helping her put on her dress," Paul managed to say before he doubled over in his chair one arm wrapped around his stomach like it was actually hurting him to laugh that hard. Daryl hoped it was.

"I'd shoot the birds," Daryl muttered. "And eat them."

Paul took a deep steadying breath before looking back up at Daryl. His eyes were still sparkling with humor and Daryl found it hard to be mad when Paul looked at him like that. "You don't have any idea do you?"

"'Bout what?"

"How special you are?"

Daryl dropped his eyes back down to Shiva and started rubbing her behind her ears. Paul wasn't making fun of him this time, in fact his voice was gentle. Too gentle. People didn't talk to Daryl that way. "Stop."

"No," Paul said. "I don't think I will. Someone has to tell you these things." He wheeled himself close enough that Daryl could reach out and touch him if he wanted to. "You're one of a kind Daryl. The best man I know. Even the tiger can sense that."

Daryl kept his eyes fixed on Shiva as he tried to fight back the emotions threatening to overwhelm him. Once he was finally sure he could speak without his voice wavering he changed the subject. "You know, I'd never seen a tiger before. Never went to a zoo."

"I didn't either," Paul said, quietly. "None of my foster homes gave a damn and the group home was worse. I always thought I'd go to the National Zoo someday just to see it, but I never did."

That was the thing about Paul. His childhood had been just as crappy as Daryl's. Not that he'd wish that misery on anyone, but it was nice that he didn't have to feel self-conscious about his past when he was with Paul.

"You know why I'm stayin' here?" Daryl asked in a whisper. "I know you heard what I told Rick."

"I have a pretty good idea," Paul replied. "But I'd like to hear it from you."

"I don't got any experience with this."

"If it helps, I feel the same way," Paul told him.

Daryl finally turned around. Paul was watching him with soft, patient eyes.

He opened his mouth to speak--after all talking to Paul was the whole reason he'd brought him here--but it was like there was some sort of block. He couldn't make any words come out, so instead he reached down and took Paul's hand, hoping that the action would speak for him.

"Together?" Paul asked hesitantly.

Daryl nodded. "Yeah. Together."

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are much appreciated.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr at [shinysylver!](http://shinysylver.tumblr.com/)


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